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Updates on Chance


March 2, 2008
Basketball Season Over, Orlando Trip, Special Monster Truck Show

            Hope all is well, it has been a little over a month and I wanted to write and let everyone know how things were going.  The best thing right now is the weather is starting to warm up here.  We have been staying very busy.  Basketball season finished up about a week and half ago.  The guys improved as the year went on, the record didn’t show how much we had improved, but some games late in the season showed that we could play with several of the teams in the district. 

            After losing out of the district tournament that Friday we had a hardware show in Orlando, FL so Desirae, Destiny, my mom, my dad, and I headed to Charlotte to catch a plane to Orlando.  We had a great time; we stayed until Wed and visited Walt Disney World a few days while there.  Some of the rides and the things we could remember from last year were tough at times, but we have to go on to be fair to Destiny.  Destiny I don’t think remembered anything from last year, the only thing that she asked which was tough to answer was when we told her that we were going to fly she wanted to know if we would get to she Brub Brub in the sky.  Not real sure how to answer that one, but we told her that he was a lot higher than any plane could ever fly.  She still misses him a lot, probably more than we will ever know.  I just can’t imagine how much fun they would be having right now, and how much fun we would be having with them, but like I have said before the best is yet to come.  The trip was a lot of fun and the weather was great.  We flew back into Charlotte on Wed and got back into town on Wed night. 

            On January the 27th we headed down to Kingsport, TN to hear a gospel group called the Dove Brothers.  They are well known and have some great music.  One of the singers great niece was at Duke with us and the weird thing is I was talking with her mother one night and telling her how a couple of their songs were awesome and how they were helping me get through day to day problems and she told me the tenor was her uncle, small world.  They put on a great show and I got to speak to him after the concert and he knew Chance and knew us, it was about a 2 ½ hour drive and it was worth every minute. 

            This next story is one that really touched me.  The lady from Advanced Auto had emailed us and wanted to know if we would be interested in coming down to the Monster Truck Show again this year.  Everyone knows how special that weekend was last year, if not go back and look in the journal archives from Feb.  Well the same driver was back that drove Grave Digger last year.  His name is Randy Brown and I want to tell you he is a top notch class act person.  He wanted to know if we were going to make it to the Show, well Destiny and all of us had been sick, but I would love the opportunity to see him again and Thank them for what they did for Chance and us last year.  After arriving at the Roanoke Civic Center I was trying to get an opportunity to speak to Randy before the show and let him know we were there, but I was sure he wouldn’t recognize or remember me because all of the fans he sees.  Well they happen to come out just for a second and yelled down to speak to him and he looked up and he remember and said that he had my number, but just didn’t have an opportunity to call.  I told him it was OK and that my wife and daughter were with me and to put on a show.  Well first round of racing he got beat out which was disappointing then came freestyle.  Well if you remember last year Chance got to judge the freestyle and Randy flipped it over and then climbed out and said that the run he just did was for Chance.  This year Randy was going to have to have a great run to ever beat some of the other guys numbers, he started off kind of off slow, but I just keep praying that he could do it, then the last 30 seconds he left nothing on the table.  After going over his time limited and crushing this and that and doing all kids of donuts they finally shut him down.  After the run the numbers added up and he had won, it brought tears to Desirae and me.  Then once again, here is what kind of person he is, he got out and was talking and before he finished, he wanted to say hello to some special friends, Brian, Desirae, and Destiny and just wanted us to know he had a special passenger with him tonight.  Man this was tough, but I knew he was right and meant every word he said.  After everyone was clearing out to go stand in the long line to get autographs and I mean long line Randy kept looking around. We never could get close enough to talk to him and the Civic Center people were trying to get us to leave.  I told one of them that I was a friend of Randy Brown’s, just like everyone else that had been there that night, I told him that I wasn’t leaving until I talked to him.  About that time I yelled at him and he saw us, he dropped everything he was doing and ran over to us.  He just wanted us to know how much Chance had meant to him and his family, he had taken his kids to the website the day he passed away and explained everything to them.  He could quit talking about how much Chance had touched him and just kept hugging Desirae and I.  He will never know how much those two special days meant to us last year and the words he said at both shows, he is a very special person.  As we said our good byes we tried to get through the long line of kids and parents waiting on him to sign autographs, but he took the time out to spend with us and then I guarantee he signed every autograph no matter how late it got. 

            Things are still going well; we are still working on Chance’s stone.   We just want to make sure we make the right decision.  We still miss him everyday, the weather is starting to warm up and just think about all of the things that we could be doing together, but those days will come. Desirae is still busy working on her Cancer bracelets and Domestic Violence bracelets.  Destiny is growing, starting to shoot a little basketball, and we have planned on taking her to her first race in May at Charlotte.  It will be a truck race, a short one; I can still remember taking him.  A lot of things can be taking away, but memories last forever.  Since basketball is over the store is starting to get busy, today I went and spoke at two different churches, which I really enjoy.  Like I said before things and days are passing by, we still miss him so much, I don’t know how to explain it.  It is tough, but the promise that God has given us makes it easier and the peace and strength he gives us makes it easier. 

            I know a lot of people still don’t know what to say, but we are OK with talking about Chance, we want you to still ask how we are doing, don’t be afraid that you might say the wrong thing.  We still love to hear people mention about him.  It helps us get through and helps us remember how much he touched people.  Once again Thanks for checking on us, and you will never know how much we appreciate everything each and everyone of you have done for us over the last year and three months.  Till next month enjoy everyday and tell your kids, family, friends, and everyone else that you love them and how much they mean to you.

 

Love,

            Brian, Desirae, Destiny, and Angel Chance




Archives
Harman Family Journal


March 5, 2008
Pushing on and Giving Back

Well, it has been a while since I last wrote.  A lot has happened since then; we have celebrated our first Thanksgiving and Christmas without Chance.  Thanksgiving was o.k. It was very quite at Brian’s family’s house.  Our children are the only little ones on Nana’s side of the family.  Destiny had all of the attention from all the adults of course.  She is so rotten.  She really is growing up.  She reminds me so much of Chance at that age; dancing, singing and jumping around.  Never a dull moment at our house.  I am so thankful for all the blessings God has given us.  I find myself appreciating every chuckle and smile she gives us and definitely every moment.  Destiny’s personality is really starting come out.  She is so much fun.  She is spending time with Brian more now; this is a good thing.  I have been praying for Brian and her to develop that special father and daughter relationship.  Brian tries so hard to spend more time with her and do things for her but she wouldn’t let him.  She always wants Mommie.  I think it is because I stay at home with her all day and we play all the time.  Brian and I were talking and he felt like he had nobody since Chance passed away.  Destiny sort of helped fill the void a little with me and we became closer.  Brian and Chance were best friends on the father and son aspect.  When Destiny was born Brian had to tend to Chance while I fed Destiny and put her to bed.  I would tuck Chance in but Brian would lay down with him; they spent that special time together watching monster trucks or basketball before he went to sleep.  Destiny wouldn’t her Daddie lay down with us or take part in some activities.  Now don’t get me wrong when it is play time Brian is her number one person.  It has begun to change now; she is letting Daddie do more for her.  I am so thankful God has answered my prayer.  I couldn’t imagine going from having a child relationship (with Chance) and then having absolutely nothing, no child allowing you to tend to them; for a while there my heart was breaking for Brian also. 

            We all continue to miss Chance like crazy but we know we will see him some day if not real soon.  Yesterday Destiny wanted to take 2 balloons up to Bubba’s place to let them go.  One was for Chance and the other for Joshua.  She released the balloons and Chance’s got stuck in the tree.  She was devastated, well I told her that Jesus would make the wind blow and it would come out of the tree and go to Bubba later.  Well, needless to say today we went to town and she wanted to stop by Bubba’s place to see if his balloon went up to him.  The whole way there I prayed for that balloon to be out of that tree.  She was so excited when we arrived and the balloon was no where to be found!!  She told me Jesus had blown it out of the tree and Bubba had caught it.  It made chuckle.

            Today God sent us another sign.  Destiny and I were laying down for a nap, watching Scooby-Doo.  If anybody knows, Chance was a big Scooby-Doo fan, (he left his legacy with his little sissy).  Then all of a sudden we hear this big bang followed by several small bangs.  I became a little uneasy trying to figure out what it was and what had fallen.  Destiny and I walked around the house and couldn’t find anything, and then we walked past the stairs that led to Chance’s room upstairs.  I looked at the stairs and found his four year old picture had fallen off the wall and sled all the way down the stairs, without breaking and facing right at me.  If this is not a sign I don’t know what is, I had this feeling come over me that everything is all right, a peaceful feeling.  I chuckled and spoke out loud for Chance to come in our bedroom and watch Scooby with us.  We have not even been upstairs for a while and it is no reason for that picture to have fallen.  It has been there for a while now.  It was the last picture Chance took professionally.  God is so great; he continues to give us that sense of peace and grace.

            Well, we are starting to give back even more now.  I have been praying to God to show me how he wants to work through me.  My prayers have been answered.  My heart has led me down to giving back to others.  Destiny and I are preparing Easter baskets to take to the cancer children at Duke.  I know a lot of you guys sent Chance things and it made him so happy, even if it was just a card.  I know how the parents feel if they can’t leave the hospital to get there child something for a Holiday.  So we decided we are going to take their basket to the hospital to relieve some of the stress off the parents.  Destiny and I are making baskets for the children.  We plan on taking the baskets down the Friday before Easter to deliver them to the children.  We have about 13 baskets so far we are filling.  Destiny loves to help put the goodies in them.  She tells everyone she giving them to sick kids like Bubba was.  If anyone would like to send an Easter basket please deliver them to Brian’s store if you are local.  If you are local to my parents (Big Island) you can give them to my mom or dad.  Brian, myself, Destiny, my dad Ray and nana (Brian’s mom) are planning to deliver them.  We are going to take pictures of the children receiving the baskets, so keep checking the web site.  We also are getting wagons painted in memory of Chance with cartoons characters on them to donate to the children’s wing at Duke and other hospitals.  Laura’s dad Coach Pratt is having his classroom paint them for us.  We are very excited about this.  Chance loved the wagons he got to ride in for appointments across the hospital; it was one of the highlights going to visits.  It helped make the visit all better.  We bought a few wagons and then others wanted to donate wagons also.  I think we are up to 9 wagons now.  I can’t wait to get these finished and we are able to deliver them to the hospitals for the children.  I have a lot planned and under the works right now but keep checking and you can see the pictures from where we are trying to make a difference in at least one child’ life.  Well, this has gotten a little lengthy and I have several other ways to give back to others in need but I will have to tell you about them next time.  Until then, may God continue to bless you and enjoy each and every moment with your loved ones.

 

Love,

            Desirae, Brian, Destiny and Angel Chance

      

 




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