In Loving Memory
of
Chance Wesley
HARMAN
October 22, 2002  -  July 6, 2007

Happy First Birthday in Heaven

We love and miss you very much. Nothing will ever replace the emptiness that we have since the day you were called up.  We cherish all of the good
memories and look forward to the day we hug and kiss each other again.

Love always,
Daddie, Mommie, Sissy, Papa, Nana, Poppa and Ganny

Hello again from the Harman household.   Everything here is wide open and very busy, but that is good.   We are getting ready for the family get together this weekend at the house.   Like I said in the previous update, we always had Chance a huge birthday party and this year we are doing a Halloween party instead to get the family and all of the kids together.   Chance would have turned 5 on Monday the 22 ^nd of October.   Days have been hard around here, mostly because all of the great memories we had, but that is the good thing is that we had an opportunity to make memories.   As I look at a picture of Chance last year at his birthday party you would never know anything was wrong with him, he looked so happy.  

This past weekend Desirae and Destiny went to cousin Chloe’s birthday party.   Destiny had a lot of fun and really enjoyed all of the other kids.   We just thank God everyday that he gives us the strength to go on and meet these events head on with out Chance here.   There is nothing else I can say, but that we miss him badly, he was my best friend.   I know that a lot of you probably find that hard to believe that he was the closest friend I had, but if you have children and then you lose one you will understand what kind of friend they really were.

While Desirae and Destiny were gone to Lynchburg , Dad, Bradley, Curtis, and I went to Charlotte to the race.   One year ago Thursday Dustin Hollandsworth and I took Chance down to see the qualifying for the race.   He loved it, we had so much fun, and I wouldn’t trade that trip for anything in this world.   I know Chance was there laughing this weekend when Tony Stewart hit those two cars on pit road, then I could almost hear him cheering for Jeff Gordon to win the race, he always loved to rub that in.   I have about got Destiny corrupted in being a Tony Stewart fan, but I think Chance has changed her mind somehow as well because I asked her who she was going to cheer for on Saturday while Daddy was at the race and she said Gordon.   I can still remember sitting in the hospital bed watching several of the races and hearing him yell for Tony and Jeff, man those were the days, and yes I enjoy every one of them.  

Last weekend for homecoming, Brother Mike got me to speak at church.   I was very nervous, but with God’s words and his works working through me I got through it.   I really enjoyed it and hope that something that I said would draw someone closer to God.   We are supposed to go to one of Mike’s revivals next week and speak there; I am looking forward to that as well.   Anytime I can share what God has done in my life I would love to, he has blessed me to know end.   Just like the song Drinking from my saucer, how true that is, because my cup has overflowed.  

Days are hard especially through the next couple of weeks, but we have to be focused and keep putting one foot in front of the other.   I still want to Thank everyone for the prayers, we need them everyday.   We miss him so much and nothing will every take that away, pictures are extremely hard to look at and videos too, but I am very thankful for all of the memories that we have together.   The basketball tournament is coming around, like I said before if you are interested in helping in anyway please get in touch with us, this help can come in any form, at the games, the meal, or even a contribution.   We want this to be a successful event for everyone involved.   Thank you for the stories that you have sent too, we still want to hear from anyone else that has a story.   We love each and everyone one of you and appreciate everything that you have done for us.   Look for another update in a couple of weeks.  

Love,

Brian, Desirae, Destiny, and Angel Chance.

P.S.   Here is a website I would like you to take a look at, it is my cousin’s friend who is running a marathon in support for St. Judes, check it out, pretty cool.

www.stjudeheroes.org

           Just wanted to inform everyone of what was going on here at the Harman household.  We just got back from a trip to Myrtle Beach on Sunday.  We went with my mom and dad and had a great time.  The hotel we stayed at had a nice water park with it that Chance enjoyed last year and Destiny followed that with enjoying it this year.  We missed having him there to be able to play with her.  This trip brought back a lot of memories from last year at this time.  This was the last good vacation that we all went on.  Before we went I got a call from a man that used to be from Floyd and they had moved to Myrtle Beach.  His in-laws still live in Floyd, but he had some connections with the Dixie Stampede and The Carolina Opry.  We had tickets to both shows and everyone really like them.  I want to thank Ralph and his family for getting us those tickets, it made the trip for Destiny a lot more enjoyable.  It was a great time, even though we thought a lot about the days of Chance with us. 

            October is always busy for us.  The first weekend is the Arts and Craft show that Desirae and my mom are in here at Floyd.  Desirae will be selling her jewelry and mom will be selling glass blocks with decorations on them.  She has been a little bit stressed about it because she doesn’t have all the things that she wants ready, but she is excited about getting back into it.  If you are at the show stop by and say "hey," I know she would love to talk to you.  It is at the Floyd County High School on Saturday and Sunday.  We also have communion at church this weekend with homecoming.  Brother Mike stopped by the store last week and wanted to know if we wanted to speak at his revival in a couple of weeks, and also if I wanted to speak at church sometime.  We agreed, but what I didn’t know is that he was going to ask me to do it this weekend at homecoming.  But like I said before, God will give me the words to say and it will be to glorify him and what he has done for us.  My mom’s sister and husband are coming up this weekend and they are taking mom out to Gatlinburg, TN next week.  Destiny always enjoys seeing Uncle George and Aunt Susan.  Then next weekend Desirae will head to Big Island for Chloe’s birthday party, that is Destiny’s cousin.  Her birthday is the 21^st, but they celebrate it early.  That day Dad, Bradley, Curtis (a friend of dad’s), and I are heading to Charlotte to the race.  The next weekend we are planning a Halloween party here at the house with family members, we always did this for Chance’s birthday and the kids always enjoyed coming, so we will continue this, but just not celebrate his birthday.  It will be a good family day together where we can get together and enjoy company with each other.  Then on Sunday I think Desirae and I may head to Martinsville, Marty Smith a friend of Mitch Reed’s got us tickets to the race.  Then the last weekend we are heading to Lancaster, PA for a Friday and Saturday with my mom and dad and Desirae’s mom and dad.  We took Chance up there about 3 years ago and he really enjoyed the pumpkin patches and things so we are going to take Destiny back for the same thing.  Desirae enjoys all of the crafts and our dads will enjoy seeing the Amish people work.  Then, November will be here and basketball season is just around the corner.

            I am really looking forward to basketball season; I have a great group of guys.  The Chance Harman Classic is shaping up real well.  I have sent out letters to business' asking for contributions, these contributions will go to help for the t-shirts and also to sponsor the event.  The money raised will go to a scholarship and to the America Cancer Society.  We are hoping for a huge event and a great day of basketball.  There will also be a benefit dinner going on during the games so you won’t have to go out to get something to eat.  If you are interested in helping any way from helping with the games, the dinner, contributions, or have any great ideas to make this as successful as possible please feel free to get in touch with me.  We are hoping to be able to maybe reimburse the teams for coming and that they might be able to use that money as a scholarship at their school in Chance’s name.  Once again we don’t know how big this will be, but we are shooting high and working hard to make this a great event for everyone involved. 

            Well that about sums it up, I know the next time I write I will have a lot of information to give you on the trips that we have been on.  We still miss Chance bad every single day, like everyone else says some days are harder than others.  We still love to hear stories how he touched your life or something that happened during his fight touched your life.  He was a very special kid and I will never forget that.  With his birthday coming up the 22^nd of October, if you have a story or anything that has happened to you or your family where Chance’s story touched you, please share it with us, we would love to hear them.  We have still been working on his headstone, but it is just hard to think about it.  One of the pictures we like is on one of the videos that we have.  Desirae and I don’t know if we are ready to tackle watching them yet.  In time it will get easier, with God’s grace the time will come.  I don’t know how to tell you again thank you so much for what you have done for Chance and my family over the last year, your prayers and support have been what makes the days easier.  I feel like we have been in a Verizon Network commercial, I look behind me and I have thousands and thousands of people there.  Thank You.

            Love,

            Brian, Desirae, Destiny, and Angel Chance

P.S.  Please share you story with us.

P.S.S If you have any great ideas on the tournament, please share them with us too.

Send them to info@samefight.org with the title Chance Harman Classic

Well, a lot has happened since the last time I wrote in the journal.  We have celebrated our first holiday without Chance (his birthday) and about a month ago my sister was tragically killed and sent to be with the Lord.  Things have changed so much in the last 6 months for our family.  I encourage each and every one of you to cherish each day and make the best of it because you never know when God will call you home.  We all have to be ready just as Jesus says in the bible. 

As you probably know Chance would have turned five Oct. 22, we did have a small Halloween party in honor of him.  We know he would have enjoyed it, I know Destiny did.  The day of his birthday we had Bubba day.  We decided every birthday to take Destiny to a place they would have enjoyed, this year it was the Safari Park in Natural Bridge.  We took Chance there when he was about Destiny’s age (2 ½ Yrs. Old).  Destiny had just been born.  Chance thought it was funny to put the back window down on her in the infant car seat and let the animals stick there heads in and lick her.  I told Destiny this story as we drove through the park; she laughed and said “Bubba funny”.  She thought it was hilarious Bubba did that to her, she even practiced putting the window down and letting the animals in.  The memories brought a smile to all of our faces.  We went to the gift shop at the park and Destiny bought Bubba a big giraffe to put at his special place.  She loves giraffes the same has he did.  She got to feed the giraffes out of her hand and she thought it tickled to have them lick her.  If you ever get an opportunity visit the Safari Park in Natural Bridge, children along with adults love it.  I think Brian and I enjoyed it as much as the children did.  If you need more information you can visit their website.  It can be googled and you can pull it up from there. 

We all are doing well, we continue to miss Chance a lot but we know he is with us in heart and spirit.  Yesterday Papa Harman cut the trees down in front of our house.  Destiny and I stayed outside all morning watching them fall; I know Chance would have loved it.  As we sat in the grass watching, a dragonfly flew by our heads. Chance loved dragonflies and butterflies.  I just smiled and knew he was there with us.  We later went in for a nap and came back out in the evening.  Destiny and I sat in the grass watching papa and Jesse work cutting down the trees.  Then all of a sudden a butterfly landed on the end of my shoe!  I smiled and looked up to the sky.  God is so good; he continues to give us his grace.  I thanked God at that moment for the everlasting peace and grace he gives us.  It is moments like these that continue to feel us with loving memories.

Destiny continues to talk about Bubba and wants to take balloons to his place.  We took his giraffe up there and she placed it on the cemetery spot.  The day of his birthday she released a huge Scooby-Doo balloon; one he had taken back and forth to the hospital with him for his room.  I had saved it and we blew it back up again.  She smiled and told Bubba to catch it when she released it.  Destiny continues to grow up fast; she is a lot of fun now.  I know Chance would have really enjoyed her; she is at a great age.  It is hard sometimes when I think what it would have been like.  I try not to focus on the “what would have been”, it only brings me tears.  Instead I try to focus on the good memories and what Chance is doing now in Heaven.  I am sure my sister Sherrie and Chance are having a blast.  I know God has his hands full right now because those two were a handful together and you want to talk about loud and mischievous. 

My family always joked about who was going to be with the Lord next so they could see Chance first, I just never thought my sister would beat me.  My mom and dad always bragged if you go by age they would beat everyone, well Sherrie pulled a fast one on them.  I always reminded them that age doesn’t matter; it is whoever the Lord has next on his list.  I do miss Chance a lot but I am grateful for everyday I am allowed with my own family.  I know God has more work for me to do here on Earth and my purpose here has not been filled yet, but what a day it will be when I get to Heaven and meet my maker and see my baby again.

Please pray for my nephew Zack (Sherrie’s son), he is only ten and now doesn’t have a mother.  My sister went through a divorce about two years ago; it was not a pretty one.  My family has not been allowed much contact with Zack since my sister was shot.  Zack is with his real father.  My parents go to court Nov. 5 for partial custody rights of Zack, I only pray God will prevail and do what is right for Zack and everyone.  It is so hard as a child now days, much less when you have witnessed things this child has.  Zack was in the house when my sister’s ex-boyfriend broke in and shot her.  I only wish I could protect children from such horrible things, they are too young to see such an evil world.  I thank God everyday for putting his arms around Zack and giving him the knowledge to run and lock himself in the bathroom.  It reminds me of the song by John Michael Montgomery “The Little Girl”.  By Gods grace my nephew survived, I know he was there holding him.  My sister left a living Will behind too; it is being protested now also.  Please pray God sees forth my sister’s wishes are granted.  Zack was Sherrie’s life and all that she had, she would do anything for him.  She is not here now but I know she would like to leave what she had for him.  I know material things don’t mean a thing where we all are going, but I know sissy would like to leave him a nest egg when he got of age.  Nothing will replace the loss of his mother but she tried to leave him all she had here on Earth; memories, love and knowing Christ. 

Thank you all for continuing to read our updates.  It gives Brian and me an opportunity to express our thoughts and feelings to others.  Since our journey our eyes have been opened so much as why we are here on Earth.  We see things so much more clearly.  I get frustrated sometimes when I see people not living there life right and not praising God for all things.  God is so good and we may not understand the reason for heartache and pain but behind all things God prevails.  Good will come out of all things good or evil, it is a purpose for everything.  If it brings one more person to the Lord then it will be worth the pain in the end.  The same as my sister being shot; yes, it was an evil act but some good will come out of it, it may not be today, tomorrow or next week but God will use this act to bring someone closer to him.  The same as Chance, Satan put the tumor in his head but God allowed it.  It was God’s plans to bring Chance home at an early age.  God will sacrifice the good ones to bring one lost one closer to him.  Does it hurt the loved ones left behind?  Yes, very much so but, we are all here just trying to get to Heaven.  I don’t want anyone left behind in the end.  If it takes losing my son and my sister to save one more soul then that’s o.k., for we will all be together for eternity.

Until next time,